drawings 14,8 x21 cm vomit from the unconscious, continuous drawing studies
Idle study (continuous research)
The question about contemporary
femininity turns into a balance act between frigidity and sloppiness.
In these days the perfect woman is earning money in addition to all
the old responsibilities, complaining about potential discrimination
is a stigma and does not appear modern. So outside the feminist
debate many women stay in denial of any problems. Denial is one more
of the trauma causes.
I work on the thesis that we turned
into a society of “reversed” Freud. The suppressed instincts are
supplemented with the “problem of not being sexual enough”. There
are always roles and manifested stereotypes that cause trauma as the
fulfilling is impossible for the individual.
Idle running dry, enter the void- Lost
in minds and memories of these thoughts seem to be synchronously
deleted while they happen. Catching these images and pulling them
into consciousness did not work. Reconstructing the thoughts appear
to be blocked by the conscious mind protecting the inner balance of
the moment. Drawings grow from the subconsciousness, are temporary
snapshots of unfiltered and unreflected information. In the first
place they deal with nothing more than the given image. What came
from which experience connected to which time cannot be answered yet.
Just like the question what creates which shape or color from which
happening. All remains latent and veiled.
Researches connected to suppressed
experience reached solid results in the dream studies of the
individual psychology and the psychoanalysis. Which is basement on my
research as well as the theory part from the catalog edition “phone
drawings” of Dieter Roth, Alfons Hüppi and Franz Eggenschiler.
Going to the place of idle, I let
drawings grow, accompanied by associative writing. Lines get filled
with colors and start to tell stories, in scatch books or in
installations. The subconscious information is unfiltered but encodes
the personal trauma. Leaving freedom for someone to get lost in the
drawings and find a space to fill the holes with personalized memory.
The drawings are samples of one reality of life of many.